So, You Don't Want To Go To Church Anymore?

**WARNING** THIS POST NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART & NOT FOR THE CLOSE-MINDED** YOUR LIFE COULD VERY WELL BE TURNED UPSIDE DOWN**

Ever tired of just going through the motions of Christianity and want to mine the depths of what it REALLY means to live deeply in Christ? Well, we have come to this stark realization over the past few years. We have asked ourselves difficult questions, asked God those difficult questions, and found some far-reaching answers. You might say that our world has been turned upside down - for the better! As I've talked about in previous posts, we made a choice to follow where God was leading and not man - it has forever changed our lives!

We read through Jacobsen's & Coleman's book, "So You Don't Want To Go To Church Anymore; an unexpected journey" several months ago, and I am getting ready to go through it again. Now, before I continue, I must state that I am not replacing this book as my "bible" and I'm not saying that I agree with every single word that is in it. I DO however, believe that this has some KEY truths and elements about how GOD sees our relationship with Himself and what He intended from the very beginning. I am not saying that I think the church is null and I am not saying that you shouldn't go to church - there is a healthy balance between what is being spoken about in this book that I will leave for you to read for yourself, if you choose.

What has been so refreshing and therapeutic for me is the freedom in knowing that I do not have to belong to a church in order for God to move in my life, speak to me, and grow in Him. I do not have to submit to a pastor as if I would my God. (I am NOT saying that we shouldn't respect our leaders, etc. What I AM saying is that God is my God and not another man; and when I say 'man' I am referring to humankind). Yes, I believe God puts pastors/leaders in authority to speak into our lives -what I don't believe is that just because a leader says you must do this or that or else you won't experience this or have that - that I must except that as the inherent truth and word of God. Anyone else who says this isn't right is essentially manipulating/controlling you to some extent so that you can help benefit their own personal agenda and not God's.

This story refers to the church as 'the institution', which I do agree with. Once you have a payroll and a group of leaders governing the overall decisions, you have an institution. There is no such mention of this in the Bible anywhere. God intended for us to be in relationship with Him - yes, have fellowship with other believers - but no in the sense that this one reason would keep you from being in fellowship with Him. This is a concept that I struggled with after we left our church a few years ago. We knew that we couldn't walk in the lies anymore with them, yet we felt like we had no worth, so to speak without being in a church. Now you mustn't confuse this by me saying we shouldn't have fellowship with other believers. The whole idea behind this is that God never said "if you don't go to a church and follow the prescribed formula, you will never be able to have relationship with me." When talking about approval, the book quotes:

"Do what they want and they shower you with affirmation. Cross them and they'll crucify your reputation, with or without the facts." ... "it's a lot easier for you to get out of the system than it is to get the system out of you."

See, we went through the martydom by leaving the church we were at - as if we had some sort of disease and had lost our salvation. We took a stand on what we believed to be wrong and what we believed to be the Truth and chose to follow the Truth. No more approval once we disagreed with what the "masses" told us to believe. At another section of the book, they have a discussion on guilt and how it is used to gain the desired outcome by controlling a situation:

"Guilt does that. It shoves us away from God in our time of need, instead of allowing us to run to him, presenting our greatest failures and questions so that we might receive his mercy and grace....we use guilt to conform people's behavior, never realizing the same guilt will them far from God."

See, it's a dangerous scary game. And we still get caught up in now that we're gone, just because it is human nature and when these things have been literally ingrained/indoctrinated in us since becoming a Christian, it's hard to just 'stop' all of a sudden. But thanks be to God that He is the ultimate in charge and that when we truly choose to follow HIM and not man, it will happen automatically. Your life is turned upside down without you even knowing it because you have been choosing to put God first and not the approval and guilt-driven system of man.

Weather you agree or not, this book is definitely worth reading. If you disagree, this is great material to debate and argue your points with :) - if you agree with stuff inside, then you're in for a whole new ride as well!

Letting Go

The past year, or bit more, we have been in the process of processing, dealing, grieving, and letting go. I have been learning that there comes a time in life where you must decide what is "right" for your family and what is Truth and what you are OK with being "gray". I just never thought that we would hit something like this so soon. I know that as a parent, I am responsible for the influences and examples that Kaileigh grows up with and adapts as her own eventually, but I never really thought about the fact that making decisions based on all of these things starts now - that we are sowing seed into not only our lives, but Kaileigh's, and into all of our futures.

We came to a cross roads awhile back where we had to choose between what we felt God was telling/leading us and where man was telling us we should go. (you can read in-depth on that here) Well, we chose to take a step of faith and follow where we felt God leading. And in this process we have lost friends, but we have also made new ones - and kept some who have chosen the same path. We have learned that forgiveness isn't always what it looks like

But the hardest part of all this? LETTING GO. Letting go of the idea of friendship(s) that never really were - authentic. Letting go of an idea that was never really real to begin with - that truth wasn't The Truth. Letting go of the fact that we were strung along to follow something that was not for our spiritual gain, but for personal, human gain. Letting go of a memory that never really was what it looked like. And letting go of all the emotions and experiences and wondering, was it really what it seemed and realizing that nothing will ever be the same again.

When people talk with us, I often relate to the passage in Genesis where Lot and his family leave Sodom & Gomorrah. God tells them not to look back. Oh boy - "don't look back God?" Well, that is what it has been. Learning to let go and to not look back - on something that never was Truth. To know that God said "go, take your family, and run and do not look over your shoulder."

Now, I am not saying that I am looking back and regretting. What I AM saying is that I continue to go through this grieving process of realizing that we have left an "old way", so to speak and have started a "new route" and as we continue to experience God's blessing and excitement, I grieve from time to time for those who I was close to, no longer share those same values and convictions or share the same goals and it is sometimes more than my heart can handle.

That 'Still, Small, Voice': Caffeine or Jesus?

Caffeine. Ah...that is literally the first thing I do each morning. I grab a fresh brewed latte and sit down on the couch and try to quickly 'wake' myself up. Usually I am watching Kaileigh go directly to her toy box and begin her "busy" day and wondering how someone who only slept for 4-5hrs the night before can be so bubbly without the latte! And here's the thing - my body depends on this every morning and usually more than one is consumed by days end. Yes, "hello, my name is Jordan and I'm a coffee addict. It's been 6 seconds since my last drink." :)

Jesus. Ah.....that is not the first thing I do each morning. I've never been one for the traditional "personal devotional time" every morning, but I have ALWAYS had a daily relationship with the Lord; sometimes it's a prayer, other times it's a scripture, and still other times it's the everyday tasks where He meets me at. But, the past few weeks I haven't had the time of seeking and conversing with Him that I usually do. That 'still, small, voice' hasn't been as clear and obvious. You know, the one where you think to yourself "is that me or is it the caffeine talking?"

I had several experiences this past week where there was no doubt it was the Holy Spirit talking to me and I just chose to ignore that 'voice'. Here I am asking the Lord to show Himself to me and to 'be near to me' as I grieve, process, and move forward and I'm not evening listening! Ha! And afterwards, I literally would shake my head and say, 'yep. you tried to tell me and I just ignored.'

I have been going through a study on A Call for Character by Greg Zoschak. The idea of love relationship with the Father and living in constant communion with Him in the everyday tasks - not just on Sundays and not just at the start or end of our days. What a concept. One that I desire to continually cultivate. This is what I have been deep in thought over the past 4 weeks. What does it mean to have - to cultivate - a love relationship with the Lord. To know who He is and how He speaks to me. It has been a very refreshing and healing time for me. The very fact that fear dissipates and joy overflows by simply cultivating a relationship with the Lord- and if I'd been through more than 2 chapters, I'm sure I'd have more!

So next time you hear that 'still, small, voice', it may not be the 4th latte of the day talking - it could just be your Heavenly Father desiring to converse! Because how nice would it be for my body to 'depend' upon that daily relationship just as it depends on the coffee I immediatly feed it each morning!

Lipstick and God

So it has been so busy here the past few weeks! My daughter and I got to travel with my husband to the State High School basketball tournament to watch him ref and spend time with family. We are finally getting back into a groove here at the Davis household! And believe it or not, I actually did not have content pre-written to post while away.

The past weeks I have been enjoying a book, Sex God. This book frequently brings tears to my eyes and touches my soul. I think that anyone should check it out - the title is only the beginning! This author has amazing podcasts as well and are definitely worth checking out as well. One of the chapters that I most recently read was entitled "God wears lipstick". I have found this chapter to be very applicable for where I am currently in my walk with God and our stage as a family right now. The entire context of the chapter was centered around a story of a British Lieutenant Colonel who was part of liberating a German concentration camp.

Bell quotes in this chapter:

"How you treat the creation, reflects how you feel about the creator. When a
human being is mistreated, objectified, or neglected, when they are treated
as less than human, these actions are actions against God. Because how you
treat the creation reflects how you feel about the Creator."

he goes on to say...

"When I respect the image of God in others, I protect the image of God in
me. When Jesus speaks of loving our neighbor, it isn't just for our neighbor's
sake. If we don't love our neighbor, something happens to us. And in trying to
protect the image of God in them, we just might be protecting the image of God
in ourselves in the process. Because with every decision, conversation, gesture,
comment, action, and attitude, we're inviting heaven or hell to earth."

This concept really hit home for me. I have watched and listened and known of so many things where people have been mistreated by those who claim to love our Creator the most. And what has grieved me the most is that they are hurting themselves so much more. They are not just hurting the other, but themselves- their families - their relationship with the Maker.

At the end of this chapter Bell finishes the story of the British officer saying that one afternoon a huge shipment of food and medicine arrive - and boxes full of lipstick. The officer states that people were walking around with 'scarlet red lips' and walking around 'with pieces of lipstick clutched in their hands'. The officer states "at last someone had done something to make them individuals again, they were someone, no longer merely the number tattooed on the arm....that lipstick start to give them back their humanity."

Bell finishes by saying,

"...sometimes, the difference between heaven and hell may be a bit of lipstick."

My husband and I have chosen a path that we want to protect the image of God in ourselves - we want to invite heaven to earth - to our home - to our in and outs of daily life - to our hearts and minds. I don't ever want to say that I was known for taking away from a person's humanity - their image in Christ and in so doing, do the same thing to myself.

"What Is This?"

'Oh, what is this!?'

Though it is not that clearly articulated, this is Kaileigh's favorite phrase lately. She walks around pointing at everything and saying 'oh! what is this!?' The excitement in her voice and just the pure "wow" and "wonder" of everything that she sees and touches. And I never get tired of hearing her ask this phrase and watching her eyes light up.

I am learning so many things through my daughter. She reminds me daily of the love that God has for me and how he never tires of hearing us say 'Oh, what is this!?' Yet, how often do we pause in wow and wonder at what God has surrounded us by-by what He is doing in us and for us? It seems that at some point we stop looking and asking 'Oh, what is this!?' and just go about our day, when all He is wanting and waiting for us to do is ask this question and watch our eyes light up as we get all excited at His marvelous hand and work in our lives.

I have been in such awe these past months as I notice all around me things that God has done and is doing and it does cause me to get excited and say 'Oh, what is this!?'

Healing in Transition

We have been in quite the transition period over the past year. Facing our fears and listening to the Lord, we embarked to go where God was leading rather than where man was telling us was the right path. I myself had been looking for a place to connect and be fed and encouraged through The Word and with like-minded friends.

I say this all, because at some point, God always brings me back to my "roots of influence/growth". I would have to say that there are many people who have shaped what I am today and what I believe, but those that have, I am ever so grateful for God bringing them across my path. And to those of you - my friends - at The Navigators, Charis Bible College, & my FBC MOPS ladies - may the Lord bless you just as you have blessed me and my family!

I have gone from a place of grieving and feeling inadequate and exhausted; to feeling refreshed, encouraged, and capable. There have been friends and people who have come alongside and offered a helping hand - many without knowing it - and helping me steer through these past months of transition; and not just me, but to my husband as well. To feel again the ability and the capacity to reach out and give back as I once felt before is invigorating. And though the waves are still rolling high, I now feel encouraged and prepared. I am reminded that I am not alone; that there are others.

There is a song that I have never once not gotten goose bumps while listening to/singing. It still grabs a hold of me and ministers to me and I am so excited to feel the passion that was once so strong long ago, has returned!

Trees of life are blooming Your word plants the seed and we feel it
growing. Your kindness leading to repentance, We see traces Of deliverance Lord, thank You for mercy

Oh, can you hear it?It's the song of the redeemed; The pursuit of
passion for the one who set us free.

Oh, can you hear it? We're crying out for
more. Listen to our song, It's turning into a Holy Roar

Rivers of renewal Spirit whisper a revival And send us rushing Open hearts with hopes of unity Servants to love in lost humanity. Lord, send us reaching.

Oh, we come rejoicing and singing and
crying out to you, Lord Can you hear the Holy Roar

- Christy Nockles, Watermark

I am so thankful for the Lord's leading and for His voice and for those who listened to Him simply by reaching out and extending a hand. There truly is healing in transition.